TheCelticKraut
Musings on life, the universe and everything - including the English and German languages - by a Welshie in Germany.
Thursday, February 5, 2026
Punctuation - because it looks pretty
Monday, January 19, 2026
"Damn! I forgot to pack the mackerel!"
Yes, sitting on the coach heading towards Bavaria on 28 December last year, those words really did pass through my mind. I'd forgotten to pack the mackerel.
Now, why on earth would any sane person think about packing tinned fish when going on a half-board holiday (i.e. with breakfast and a three-course dinner included)?
Well, I'll tell you. In the final days of 2004, when all the world added a new word to their vocabulary (tsunami), I found myself in Hong Kong, visiting a former student of mine. Her parents kindly invited me to join them at a large restaurant on New Year's Eve. Looking around, I think I might have been the only non-Chinese person there. But that didn't faze [stören] me as, during my student days in Manchester and Göttingen, I had often found myself in a room full of people whose language I couldn't understand, be it Chinese, Farsi or Arabic.
Anyway, we sat at a large circular table close to an aquarium, behind which was the kitchen. The father got up, walked over to the fish tank, stabbed a finger in the direction of one hapless [unglückselig] fish swimming past and said, "That one."
About three minutes later, the fish was lying on a plate on the table, gutted, filleted and cooked. Amazing.
The father then told me why it is important to always eat fish on New Year's Eve. Apparently, the fish scales represent coins and if you eat fish, it'll be good for your money luck.
Since then, I've always done that. Even if it's just smoked salmon sandwiches or, in Budapest once, a tuna sandwich from the Subway chain.
As soon as I got to the small Bavarian village where the hotel was, I found the nearest shop selling food and bought some tinned fish and it was a good job I did so, too. The hotel didn't intend serving fish on 31 December, and I didn't feel that great either, so I picnicked in my room and made sure I had my mackerel after all since I really could use some money luck this year.
And now you know what to do in 11.5 months' time to ensure you'll be rolling in it in 2027, too: eat fish.
Monday, January 12, 2026
Song lyrics - past and present
Some day, when I'm awfully low
When the world is cold
I will feel a glow just thinking of you
And the way you look tonight
[Verse 2]
Yes, you're lovely, with your smile so warm
And your cheeks so soft
There is nothing for me, but to love you
And the way you look tonight
[Bridge]
With each word, your tenderness grows
Tearing my fear apart
And that laugh wrinkles your nose
Touches my foolish heart
[Verse 3]
Lovely, never, never change
Keep that breathless charm
Won't you please arrange it? 'Cause I love you
Just the way you look tonight
[Instrumental Break]
And that laugh that wrinkles your nose
It touches my foolish heart
[Verse 3]
Lovely, don't you ever change
Keep that breathless charm
Won't you please arrange it? 'Cause I love you
A-just the way you look tonight
[Outro]
Mm-mm, mm-mm
Just the way you look tonight
What a day for a daydream
What a day for a daydreamin' boy
And now I'm lost in a daydream
Dreamin' 'bout my bundle of joy
[Bridge]
And even if time ain't really on my side
It's one of those days for takin' a walk outside
I'm blowin' the day to take a walk in the sun
And fall on my face in somebody's new-mowed lawn
[Verse 2]
I've been havin' a sweet dream
I've been dreamin' since I woke up today
It's starrin' me and my sweet dream
'Cause she's the one makes me feel this way
[Bridge]
And even if time is passin' me by a lot
I couldn't care less about the dues you say I got
Tomorrow, I'll pay the dues for droppin' my load
A pie in the face for bein' a sleepy bull toad
[Bridge]
And you can be sure that if you're feelin' right
A daydream will last along into the night
Tomorrow at breakfast, you may prick up your ears
Or you may be dreamin' for a thousand years
What a day for a daydream
Custom-made for a daydreamin' boy
Now I'm lost in a daydream
Dreamin' 'bout my bundle of joy
Mummy, daddy, look at me
I went to school and I got a degree
All my friends call it the big D
I went to school and I got the big D
I got the big D
I got the big D
I got the big D
I went to school and I got the big D
[Verse 2]
Is your muffin buttered?
Would you like us to assign someone to butter your muffin?
Excuse me (What?)
Excuse me (What?)
Hey, you, over there
On the chaise longue, in your underwear
What are you doing sitting down?
You should be horizontal now
[Refrain]
On the chaise longue, on the chaise longue
On the chaise longue, all day long, on thе chaise longue
On the chaisе longue, on the chaise longue
On the chaise longue, all day long, on the chaise longue
Is your mother worried?
Would you like us to assign someone to worry your mother?
Excuse me? (What?)
Excuse me? (What?)
Hey, you, in the front row
Are you coming backstage after the show?
Because I've got a chaise longue in my dressing room
And a pack of warm beer that we can consume
[Refrain]
On the chaise longue, on the chaise longue
On the chaise longue, all day long, on the chaise longue
On the chaise longue, on the chaise longue
On the chaise longue, all day long, on the chaise longue
On the chaise longue, on the chaise longue
On the chaise longue, all day long, on the chaise longue
On the chaise longue, on the chaise longue
On the chaise longue, all day long, on the chaise longue
Wednesday, January 7, 2026
And you call this..."progress"?
You could speed up the recording, slow it down and even record stuff of your own (such as my grandmother going through her photo album and telling the stories behind the pictures).
To ensure that it works in my evening classes, I need that, plus audio cables, plus a cable that connects to the digital projector and the cable to connect to the power (in case the battery runs out). Plus a nice bag to ensure the thing is suitably protected from bumps etc.
Monday, January 5, 2026
The UK is a United Kingdom? As if!
Saturday, December 27, 2025
Buy cheap, buy again
That's a phrase that's been around for a long time. Basically, if you buy something cheaply, you can bet that it will soon wear out and you'll have to buy another one. More money.
Terry Pratchett, the fantasy writer whose stories threw light on our everyday lives, even though they were full of witches, trolls, dwarves and wizards, came up with a good description of this theory - that the rich spend less money because they buy more expensive stuff - in his books about the guards of Ankh Morpork called "Men at Arms":
The reason that the rich were so rich, Vimes reasoned, was because they managed to spend less money.
Take boots, for example. He earned thirty-eight dollars a month plus allowances. A really good pair of leather boots cost fifty dollars. But an affordable pair of boots, which were sort of OK for a season or two and then leaked like hell when the cardboard gave out, cost about ten dollars. Those were the kind of boots Vimes always bought, and wore until the soles were so thin that he could tell where he was in Ankh-Morpork on a foggy night by the feel of the cobbles.
But the thing was that good boots lasted for years and years. A man who could afford fifty dollars had a pair of boots that’d still be keeping his feet dry in ten years’ time, while the poor man who could only afford cheap boots would have spent a hundred dollars on boots in the same time and would still have wet feet.
There's a nice article here that talks more about that: https://terrypratchett.com/explore-discworld/sam-vimes-boots-theory-of-socio-economic-unfairness/
Why do I mention this phrase? Because a couple of weeks ago, I saw an article in The Guardian newspaper praising the clothing range called Heattech from Uniqlo, the Japanese clothing chain. The prices seemed reasonable (about 15 euros for a long-sleeved top, for example). And the products were lauded to the skies.
Hence, after a walk, I went home via the Uniqlo shop, picking up three articles for around 60 euros in total.
Reader, they're not very good: I sat on the sofa with all three items of clothing on under my outer wear, freezing and shivering. And they soon became smelly. Well, they would: they're not made of natural materials. Which is why I have returned to the best solution I've found to chilly temperatures: merino wool base layers, the stuff that mountain climbers wear.
Anything made of merino wool will keep you warm and toasty. It's like the mythical armour made by dwarves in The Lord of the Rings: mithril. It's so strong that not even a spear wielded by a mountain troll can pierce it. No matter how hard the troll tries to skewer you.
Well, it's the same with merino wool clothing: the cold just can't pierce it.
However, it's not cheap. A merino wool top I bought from the men's section in a mountain-climbing shop a couple of years ago cost EUR 90. However, after wearing it one winter, I got 270 euros back from my heating bill. (This was before heating became hideously expensive.) Well worth the expenditure, then.
So when the winter sales come in January, see if you can find anything with merino wool in it: underwear, thin tops, long johns, socks or pullovers. Non-scratchy, non-smelly, non-bulky, easy to wash in the waching machine...you'll thank me for it.
Friday, December 19, 2025
You'd rather be injured than seen?
Do you see how much more visible you suddenly become? You can let these things (6 in a pack!) dangle freely or you can make a loop out of them. No batteries required; they come with cables that allow you to recharge them via a USB port, e.g. on your computer.
Punctuation - because it looks pretty
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